Pityparty

Zippadeedooda. I got myself one of these here bad boys. And I look ridunkulous in it.

I come out of the Dr.'s office into the waiting room. There's this lady sitting there waiting. She stares at my foot. Then she tells me I'm going to roast when I go outside. Thanks friend. You have a nice day too. Isn't there a patient oath or code that if you're a patient you should do no harm or something? Somebody needs to fill her in on her oath obligations. I was harmed and she did it.

Then I go to the post office. I wait in the line with the 6 other people without a steplite easy strider walker brace velcroed on. I catch every person at one point or the other starring at my foot and I see a bubble form over their head with the words, "that looks like an elephant foot" written inside of it. And then those words dissolve and these words replaced them: "that sounds ALOT like an elephant's foot plus it

ska-weaks somewhat if you're only just standing there." And then those words dissolve and were replaced with, "you are kind of a looser, because didn't you break that foot 5 months ago?"

Then I come home, get a drink because I did roast when I went outside, or at least I thought I did. I clunk over to the neighbor's house to teach 8-ll year old girls how to draw. My neighbor takes one look at me and begins to act as if I had blood coming out my nose. I get her all calmed down and then her husband walks in and I have to start it all over again. Then the little girls come in. Have you ever seen the pity eyes? Well I got the pity eyes. They didn't say anything, and I didn't have to explain anything, which I appreciated, but man, those 8-11 year old pity eyes can make you feel like you're oozing with pity factor every breath you take.

My brother sent me a box of Swiss chocolates because he just went there. And I love him for it. I'm thinking it is time to crack that baby open and eat about 6. And then I'm going to look down at my roasting foot and have another one, a really big elephant sized one, and I'm going to dedicate it to the lady in the Dr.'s office that has no Laderach chocolate from Switzerland.

And I hope she reads this blog because this is what they look like. And they are really super yummy.