Yes, I've been gone awhile. I could go on and on about why, but do you really want to hear it? You're probably not even reading this because you kept checking and checking for a new post and there never ever was one so you decided forget Mommacita and her non posting moods. Isn't it all tired and rusty for you? I thought so. However, we're 90 minutes away from the day of Thanks, and so darn it, let's be a thanking.
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So moving on.... imagine me, Mommacita-lazyetera, hand in hand with Jimmy Falon, host of late night TV. I know some people (neice, daughter) who have crushes on this guy, so let me just state right here, right now, that the hand holding is purely platonic. I could never beat out those two beauties. Because they are cute AND funny.
Moving on again... On his show, Jimmy often writes thank you notes, (to people like Frebreeze (for covering up odor and grime so we don't have to wash something and have it really clean instead)) And so even though I am no Jimmy Falon, nor pretend to be, and I am only someone who would platonically hold hands with him, I'd like to send some thank you notes. Because, he has touched me, deep down, with his thankful ness. And Because, darn it, we should all be about the thanking this weekend.
So let's all be thankful:
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Dear Guy Who Ran a Red Light in the Intersection of Kruise Way and Highway 217,
Thank you. Thank you for making me laugh out loud, as you ran that red light and almost hit me broadside while I was on my way to Trader Joe's. Thank you for leaning forward in your seat onto your steering wheel while you were doing it, because it really DID make it seem like you weren't running a red light and it really DID make you look like you were going really really fast. That leaning forward in the seat in times such as these really makes all the difference. And Thank you for those eyes of determination. I laughed out loud, because a good NASCAR reference is always a winner for me.
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Very Truly Yours,
Mommacita
(and now please imagine me folding up the thank you note and licking the envelope only on the point because I can't stand the taste, just like Jimmy)
Dear Hersey Candy Company,
Thank you Hersey Candy Company for only making Minty M&M's at Christmas time and not all year round. Because I would be as big as a moose.
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Very Truly Yours,
Mommacita
(folding, licking, only on the pointing)
Dear Trader Joes,
Ditto the above Thank you note but insert Peppermint Jo'Jo's for Minty M&M's.
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Very Truly Yours,
Mommacita
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PS The chocolate covered Peppermint JoJo's are really sublime. Hows about a coupon sometime?
(ditto as well on the folding, and licking on the point. talk about wearing out a bit)
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Dear Henry,
Thank you little Henry, for twinkling your eyes at me. And thank you little Henry, for grinning at me through your pacifier. And Thank you Little Henry, for visiting me for a whole month. And little Henry? About letting me kiss your neck whenever I want? And going limp when I do it?
T-H-A-N-K Y-O-U. I just like watching you discover the world.
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Love and Zerberts,
GranMommacita
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Dear Sawyer,
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Thank you for letting me play "Fisher Price Christmas Manger Little People" with you all week. I never thought I'd say this, but singing Away In A Manger every time you pushed the button on the roof of the manger never got boring. All 48 times. Thank you for the dance each time the song played. Thank you for the jiggy attitude. And Thank you Soybean, for the neck kissing and the toe biting. And the generalized snuggling. You smell good.
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Zerberts and Love,
GrandMommacita
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Dear Gracie and Sophie and Ben,
Thank you for taking your medicine and getting better. I HATE dirty swines and their flu. I refuse to thank them. Thank you for talking to me on the phone and singing me a song or two. Thank you for those 3 pairs of blue eyes. I can't wait to see them. Soon! SOON! And Ben? Get ready, because I'll be a running my fingers through your hair. There might even be blogging about it. It's been known to happen.
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Love and Zerberts Times 3,
GrandMommacita
Dear Ginormous Big Screen TV that Tim showed up with that one Saturday,
Thank you for hanging on this long. You know I love ya. And thank you for not taking those disparaging remarks made by Glitch that were aimed towards you personally. They tried to double team me into replacing you, but I stood true. I am thankful that you continue to give. If an inanimate object happened to feel cold, I would make a quilt for you just in case you might be sitting there all the time feeling chilly. But they don't, so I won't bother.
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Very truly Yours,
Mommacita
PS Could you give me a sign when you're about to die so I can shop the sales?
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